Tuesday, 29 July 2014

Three Positives - Day One

I've been tagged three times now to do the social media 'Three Positives' challenge, so thought I'd best pull my finger out and start.  These are for yesterday.

1.  Finding Sam
I lived alone in Manchester from the age of 16.  I only knew one person there, a good friend from school who had left that summer to go and live with her father.  I remember meeting her father, Sam, and feeling at home.  He was a softly spoken man, a true gentleman, originally from the West Indies.  He took me under his wing, he looked out for me, he made sure I never went without.  And what a cook!  My first introduction to Hot Pepper Sauce.  He wasn't only a father figure to me, he was a good friend to me too in his own right.  I probably spent more time with him than I did with his daughter.   I lost touch with them both in the mid 90's, but found my friend recently on Facebook.  I had asked several times about her father but that question was never answered.  I didn't want to push the issue because - they may have been estranged.  Or ever worse, he may have passed away.   I thought about him often.  My friend recently had a baby, so I sent a message of congratulations.  She sent me a message to say her Dad often asked about me over the years, but had only been talking about me the other day.  I was partly gutted and partly ecstatic to find out that he still lived in the same house.  Gutted for the wasted years but thrilled that I could get in touch with him.   So I have handwritten a letter to him, and in this letter I have thanked him for his support and friendship all those years ago.  I doubt I expressed my gratitude to him at the time, being a selfish teen, but as an adult I realise that my life would have been a lot darker without him in it.  I'm grateful for the opportunity to be able to tell him this.  This particular chapter of my life housed three regrets.  Three special people lost from my life.  One friendship is beyond redemption on both her and my part.  The second... I tried last year to put right but I made things much worse.  Sometimes doing what you think is the right thing for someone else, is the wrong thing to do for yourself.   Some hurts will never heal.   And then Sam, a genuine 'losing touch'.  Lives drifting in different directions.  And he still thought about me too.  That made my day, week, month and year.   I hope to meet up with my friend and her daughter soon, and it would be lovely if Sam could be a part of that too :-)

2.  Adam's Birthday
Adam turned 8.  My 'baby'.  I asked him if he was still my baby boy, and he said yes.  I asked him why and he said this...

Adam:  Because I'm a boy, I'm the youngest and you gave birth to me


I didn't get a chance to make a cake this year, what with the weekend's road trip and subsequent pain, so told him he could choose any cake in Tesco.  He chose that.  The cake is only about a centimetre thick... But kids and their Haribo!   He had over £100 in money, and has already invested in one of those fish things, and a pair of much coveted Stompeez slippers.  The rest, I am informed, is being spent on dinosaurs.  Because what this house needs is more dinosaurs.   Thanks to all my friends and family for their cards and gifts :-)

3.  Healthy food
I've been feeling a bit bleugh after these last few weeks, what with visitors, entertaining, days out, meals out, grabbing food on the hop.  I definitely see a connection between diet and my energy levels.  So from yesterday it's back on the salad, wholemeal pasta, bread, wraps etc and fresh fruit.   My mum is taking 11 of us out for a meal on Thursday, let's see if my resolve holds!  (It won't, I can tell you now, it will be fresh battered cod and chips...). But if it's only once in a while, it's ok.  

That's my three positives for Monday.  I have a sneaking suspicion that one of today's is going to be pain relief!  Ouch :-(

M x

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