Mixed Emotions

Today really called for cake, and thankfully, the boy was making cake today in his cookery class. He's a chip off the old block... it was bloody lovely too, fair play to him. He's a great little cook, and came back with a 84% test result too. Only criticism is, the cake wasn't big enough.

Mixed emotions today. I was determined to get into the festive mood, so I banged some tunes on the Christmas bauble speaker. I was feeling really positive because - my eldest is going to be home for Christmas! My ex husband is going to bring him back on the 23rd of December, and I cannot wait to see him. It has been a long year, and it has been hard to play by the rules, especially when it comes to your own child. I think that's why I'm pretty intolerant at those who break them, and in stupid ways too, or those who take stupid risks as if nothing is going on. 

And then. Mr G jumped up - there's a news conference - and boom! Instant slump in mood after I watched it. Felt really down, shaky, and I haven't felt like this for a long time. Mr G said 'Let's go and get what we need from now until Christmas, tomorrow'. Ye Gods. I love a list as much as the next person, but Christ almighty. So, with the exception of fresh veggies, salad and perishables, that's what we're doing tomorrow. My brain hurts from making meal plans, shopping lists, sourcing recipes. But I think I'm done.  

On Christmas Eve, I always cook our ham, and we enjoy that with fresh rolls and salad and pickles. I make homemade sausage rolls, a Jamie Oliver recipe that I've used since years, which the children usually turn up their noses at because they have red onion, fresh sage and diced apricot in (heathens). The boy will make plain sausage rolls for him and the others. Mr G always bakes a Victoria Sponge.

Christmas Day we are having turkey, I have only bought a turkey crown this year though. My mother always gets a massive turkey and has it Christmas Day, uses it at the buffet on Boxing Day, has it with chips and peas the day after while making a massive stew with the leftovers. I just can't be bothered, and nine times out of ten it gets wasted. For dessert, it's Christmas pudding and white sauce for me and Mr G, and the boy has decided on an Oreo Cookie Chocolate Trifle (recipe here) for them, as they don't like Christmas pudding (again, heathens). 

Boxing Day buffet is sorted, cold meats, pickles, salad, rolls and all the usual faff like coleslaw and chips and dips. I'm going to make mini pizzas, homemade scotch eggs, bacon and cheese turnovers. For our sweet tooth we will have my homemade Christmas cake, mince pies, lemon meringue tart and I'm torn between Nigella's Girdlebuster Pie (recipe here), Sticky Toffee Pudding or this Terry's Chocolate Orange Rocky Road (recipe here). I may need to make two, and knowing my lot it's not like it'll go to waste! I'm also tempted by Nigella's Yule Log (recipe here), and especially tempted by the fact that I can make it ahead and freeze it. One less job to do.

And another big family dinner on New Year's Day. Mr G is working New Year's Eve but is finished then, so he said hell yeah to another meal around the table. I've decided on pork loin, and I think I'm going to make the strawberry cheesecake (recipe here) that I made for my daughter's birthday again for dessert because it was extra special. Last blow out before we go 100% balls to the wall committed again to Slimming World. 

He phoned Hypnos yesterday to see where the hell our bed is, and we were told it should be going to the delivery firm at the end of the week but they would chase it up, but it would definitely, definitely be with us by Christmas (I should bloody hope so, too!).

In other news, Mr G is going to cut and colour my hair. I have really had to talk him into doing it too, the cutting part, anyway. He has coloured my hair for me for years, bless him, he really is a keeper of a husband. But needs must, it is getting on my last pissing nerve, it really is. It's getting tangled in everything now. I don't think it has ever been this long, even before I cut it when I turned 40. 

So, I'm feeling pretty meh today, but tomorrow is another day. 

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