Friday, 7 August 2015

Summer? Wherefore Art Thou, Summer?

As I type this, sat drinking my early morning coffee, it's bloody freezing.  We've had nothing but rain and it feels more like Autumn than Summer.  The heating has been put back on at least three times in the last fortnight.  I should be ironing but I really don't want to.  Packing for our holiday, ye Gods, what an experience that is.  You can air quote the word 'experience' there if you like.  It doesn't matter how many times we go through the same thing, Mr G always takes too much, I take too little and due to the weather we have to pack for all four seasons.  Packing in advance means that we're operating on a skeleton wardrobe this week.  For Mr G, who has more clothes than all the Kardashian women put together, this is no problem.  For me, however, this poses an issue.  I'm not a clothes person, I rarely buy myself anything, I prefer cast offs and charity shops, and I wear things until they wear out.  So, yesterday I find myself wearing a very dressy pink and black top, with beaded embellishment, and black and white checked leggings.  I looked like a cross between a drag queen and a monochrome Rupert the Bear.  Mr G raised an eyebrow at me as I walked past.  It was the only thing this ensemble was going to raise in any man...

Mr G: What are you doing?
Me: taking a break from gathering bits. Just check my emails... Delete, delete, delete, ooooh! Six fashion mistakes we're all making...
Mr G: (Looks me up and down) Seven... No.  Make that eight. Your toenails and fingernails are painted a different colour.
Me: Shut it, Gok Wan. 

We went again on Sunday to watch Crusaders play Gloucester.  Much better weather this time, thankfully. Mum and Dad had the boys and Cait and her friend Beth came with us. It was a cracking game, plenty of tries, a little bit of handbags at ten paces, a ref who should take his sponsor's advice and actually go to bloody Specsavers, one sin bin (home), one sending off (away) and a resounding home win.  Mr G bought me a Crusaders beanie, which I could have done with the previous week. The next home match we can make is the 6th of September and hopefully they'll stay in a play off position for promotion to the Championship.  No simple up or down in rugby league, oh no.  The first plays the second, the winner goes up, the loser plays the team in fifth, the third and the fourth play... so in a nutshell you could come fifth in the league and be promoted, and come first and not get anywhere.  We're definitely going for a season ticket next year though.

Mr G excelled himself the other night, when answering a friend's call for help on Facebook.  Noticing she'd posted seven hours earlier, if anyone had a wallpaper stripper, could she borrow it.  I replied that if it wasn't too late, we had one.  It wasn't too late, I sent Mr G up with it.  Unbeknownst to me... he left the steamer in the car and handed her this...

... deadpan, poker faced.  She thanked him, looking very puzzled but too polite to admit the error.  He made small talk and eventually left and went outside to talk to her partner, who he had let in on the joke.  A few minutes later he put her out of her misery, going back with the steamer.  Even then, she was deflecting the blame from him, by saying that she should have been clearer in her post, that it was technically a wallpaper stripper.  How does he do it? Prank people and have them think it was their fault too?   

1 comment:

  1. Ah that's a classic from the pieman right there, literally just nearly spat my coffee out when I scrolled and the pic appeared. Lolz


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