Why, I hear you ask. What on earth is the matter, Shell? *Sigh*. Well... we've lived in the 'new' house for nearly four and a half years. We had a mad rush to get everywhere important decorated before we moved in. Mr G wasn't in the best of health at that time, was having all manner of cardiac related tests, and I had one week to pack up the old house, with four children, husband in and out of hospital, decorate the new house, move out and move in. We enlisted all our family and friends and to be fair, the amount of work we achieved in such a small time was pretty amazing. We looked at the woodchip and the wallpapered ceiling of the hallway, stairs and landing (WHY? For the love of God, why wallpaper the perfectly smooth ceilings?) and decided it would take too much time, and would have to wait. So they just had a lick of paint. It's quite a big job too.
The kids went back to school on Tuesday, and at lunchtime Mr G said to me; 'Soooooo - when are we doing this hall, stairs and landing then?' My heart sank. I know this man inside and out, and I knew that what he actually meant was; 'Get some old clothes on, cocker, I'm going to the bottom shed to find the wallpaper scrapers'. Why he doesn't just say what he means is another matter.
Top layer - woodchip. Not the nightmare you'd imagine, that was coming off with just a scraper. Then underneath, as you can see from the above picture, a rather fetching... I don't even have the words for what that is, tartan? Check? At some points, down the stairs, there's two layers of that underneath, same colour, different pattern. And then. Oh. When we get down to bare wall...
|It was acceptable in the 50's?|
The picture doesn't do it justice. Two rather fetching shades of green. Green GLOSS! The wallpaper sticks to the dark green and it's melting under the heat of the stripper like chewing gum. There are huge chunks of plaster falling off from around the windows. I really, really don't want to wallpaper, I was praying for nice smooth walls, and maybe had whoever painted these walls not used a yardbrush and rake to do it, they might have been. It's too much to rub down, so we need to have all the walls skimmed now. Lord knows how much that is going to cost us, I'm dreading getting the quotes in for the work. In my circle of family and friends, I have a curtainmaker. Policewoman. Teachers. Counsellor. Baker. Plumber. Computer expert. Hairdresser and barber. Florist. Solicitor. Electricians. Gardener. Cooks. Mechanic. You name it, I have a friend I can blag for 'Mates Rates' or barter with a curry and chocolate cake, but no bloody Plasterer to be seen anywhere. So, I'm thinking (and we all know how dangerous that is, and if you don't know, you'll learn quickly). How hard can it be? Plastering? You can find guides to do anything on the internet, correct?
I'll leave you guessing as to whether I'm serious or not ;-)